Creating Family Food Values

It’s a classic horror movie plot:

A group of people is stranded in a dense forest, trying to escape their captor. They run, they plan, they panic—and somehow, they keep ending up in the same spot. They're walking in circles without realizing it.

Turns out, that's not just movie magic. It’s science.

According to multiple research studies, humans are surprisingly bad at walking in straight lines—especially when there are no visual cues to guide them. Without landmarks, we physically can’t stay the course. On cloudy days or in dense forests or deserts, participants who were told to walk in a straight line ended up veering into loops—some as tight as 20 meters in diameter.

The reasons are still being debated. Maybe it’s because one leg is slightly longer than the other. Maybe it's because the terrain feels the same in every direction. But the one thing researchers agree on? When we don’t have a clear sense of where we’re going—or a visual anchor to guide us—we slowly and subtly drift off course.

Sound familiar?

Mealtime Isn’t That Different

What does this have to do with your health or feeding your family?

If you don’t have a clear direction at mealtime, you’ll end up walking in circles there, too.

You’ll keep falling back on last-minute decisions, hitting the same stress points, repeating the same rushed meals, and wondering why dinner still feels hard—no matter how many Pinterest recipes you’ve saved.

If you don’t know where you’re going, you’ll never get there. As the Cheshire Cat told Alice:

“That depends a good deal on where you want to get to.”
“I don't much care where—”
“Then it doesn't matter which way you go.”

What are you actually trying to accomplish at mealtime?

If your goal is just to get dinner on the table by 6 p.m. without a meltdown, that’s one thing.

But maybe you want something deeper:

• For your kids to enjoy vegetables.
  
• For everyone to slow down and connect.
  
• For your toddler to try something new without a full-body protest.
  
• For food to feel less like a chore and more like a rhythm.
  
  

The mistake I see families make over and over is assuming that their problem is a lack of recipes. But no amount of recipes will help you if you don’t know what you’re cooking for.

Let me show you what I mean:

• Busy, on-the-go family? You need meals that are quick, portable, and don’t rely on a last-minute trip to the store.
  
  
• Got toddlers? You’re thinking finger foods, minimal choking hazards, and realistic mess management.
  
  
• Empty nesters? You’ll want to scale back portion sizes and start learning the art of cooking in components (something I teach in Dinner Development 101).
  
  

When you don’t define your direction, you circle the same stress again and again. The solution isn’t more information. It’s more intention.

Landmarks for mealtime

Just like we need visual cues to walk straight, we need anchors to guide our meals. I call these mealtime landmarks your values, habits, and systems.

1. Values

These are your guiding principles—what matters most to you and what you want to pass on:

• Do you want your kids to have a healthy relationship with food?
  
• Do you want them to actually enjoy vegetables and learn how to cook?
  
• Do you value shared meals, manners, or preserving family recipes?
  
  

Your values point the way forward when you're not sure what to do.

2. Habits

These are the everyday rhythms that keep things moving in the right direction:

• Cleaning up after dinner
  
• Checking the fridge for snacks before asking mom
  
• Putting dirty dishes in the dishwasher, not the sink
  
  

You’re not just building meals—you’re building people.

3. Systems

These are the practical tools that help you avoid burnout:

• Grocery lists that actually match your week
  
• Dinner themes (like Taco Tuesday or Sheet Pan Sunday)
  
• Ingredient overlap so you’re not starting from scratch every night
  
  

These systems help you make progress—even on the cloudiest days.

Life will always get cloudy

There will always be after-school chaos, a surprise hospital visit, or an out-of-town guest. Life will never slow down long enough to hand you the perfect moment to start cooking differently.

That’s why you need these anchors now.

If you don’t have clear landmarks—values, habits, and systems—then you’ll keep wandering, stuck in the same loops of frustration, even if you’re trying your best.

Let’s stop walking in circles

The problem with walking in circles is… you don’t always know you’re doing it. Until you realize you’ve been here before.

Quit walking in circles over and over again. Get help with your family meals so you can get out of the same rut you’ve created by walking in the same path over and over again.

Let’s stop walking in circles and start walking toward meals that feel right for your family—meals that reflect your values, fit your lifestyle, and don’t send you into a tailspin at 5:00 p.m.

If you’re ready to find your direction and break the cycle, I’d love to help.